As you may or may not know. KPLC [Kenya power lighting company] has introduced a prepaid electricity system. Their people left a note saying they will install the prepaid shitting billing machine on Tuesday. (they came on Thursday) I thought it was a joke, you know the way KPLC is always pulling jokes on you while you are busy watching Saborati. The most exciting soap on the planet Directed by Carlos Izquierdo, ArquÃmedes Rivero. With Ana Karina Manco, Miguel de León, Astrid Carolina Herrera, Guillermo Pérez.!!! I know that last bit is totally unneccessary but what the hell, you might as well get informed on random issues that noone gives a fuck about while here.
SO, when the KPLC boys were done they put a meter on the wall in the living room, and the way they did it has made me believe this is something for poor people. I can’t imagine them doing this fuckery to anyone’s wall on Hillview! Then the man says so here is you card, you have 30 free units and you need to top up at KPLC office or you can do it through MPESA.
Now you know something is not right in this milk when you hear MPESA! Safaricom is clever. You can’t leave safaricom. It’s like me and my ex we just can’t leave each other, we have been ex since the 4th month of dating and we were doing it for 5 years!!
SO, when the KPLC boys were done they put a meter on the wall in the living room, and the way they did it has made me believe this is something for poor people. I can’t imagine them doing this fuckery to anyone’s wall on Hillview! Then the man says so here is you card, you have 30 free units and you need to top up at KPLC office or you can do it through MPESA.
Now you know something is not right in this milk when you hear MPESA! Safaricom is clever. You can’t leave safaricom. It’s like me and my ex we just can’t leave each other, we have been ex since the 4th month of dating and we were doing it for 5 years!!
The meter on the wall, idunnowhatsitsname, peeps like a microwave, and contrary to popular belief it does not chase away mosquitoes but that’s beside the point.
It peeps in 1 minute tact!!! This is a constant reminder that you should have money in your mpesa account at all times. You see should your Units get used up in the middle of dinner, you can mpesa kplc and voila! Lights back!
And because safaricom sending you an sms saying “sorry your account balance is not sufficient to complete this request. Please top up and try again.” at 2am, 5 hours after you fell asleep is not enough! You need this constant reminder that you are their client!
And since there is just so much butthole fucking one can take from Safaricom and KPLC ,am seriously thinking of calling my Russian connection and this thing will stop ticking 5 minutes after we clear that bottle of vodka. And I shall have electricity and never top up till the day I move to the green leafy suburbs!
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